The word "should" can be incredibly dangerous.
There's a lot of serious emotions attached to that word. There's a lot of major suffering that comes along with that word. Pain. Grief. Expectation. The works.
That word...can drive you mad or keep you stuck in the past.
Maybe you've heard yourself utter the words before...
"That shouldn't have happened...this should have happened...it should have gone this way."
The very fact of the matter is that it didn't go that way at all.
When you are living in the land of should you are living in the past or the future.
When you have a "should" that is living in the past, you aren't fully able to come to terms with what is actually going on in your life. You think that it should have gone some way it didn't actually go and that brings a great amount of pain and suffering to your life because you can't accept the reality of the situation.
Like in meditation, you have to come back.
There's danger in having your "should" exist in the future as well. When your should is in the future, you are projecting specific events that have to happen onto a time and place you really have no idea what will happen in the first place. Then, when your projection doesn't happen you end up being incredibly disappointed.
You have to come back.
We are all going to have incredibly painful times in our lives that are going to make us want to project an experience onto a life we really have real idea of what's going to happen. That's ok in some ways, but the reality is you have to come back to living in the mystery of the present moment.
These dark times will always be there.
But what makes us suffer endlessly is not accepting the truth.
So...you have to view it this way. What happened happened...and it couldn't have happened in any other way.
And if you let go of the future, and come back to this moment?
You get to live in the present. You get to live in knowing that life is going to take care of you no matter what happens.
"Should" doesn't exist anymore.
No past...because you've come to terms with it.
No future...because you're in the moment.
Be here.
So stay connected with the present moment.
Accept.
There's a lot of serious emotions attached to that word. There's a lot of major suffering that comes along with that word. Pain. Grief. Expectation. The works.
That word...can drive you mad or keep you stuck in the past.
Maybe you've heard yourself utter the words before...
"That shouldn't have happened...this should have happened...it should have gone this way."
The very fact of the matter is that it didn't go that way at all.
When you are living in the land of should you are living in the past or the future.
When you have a "should" that is living in the past, you aren't fully able to come to terms with what is actually going on in your life. You think that it should have gone some way it didn't actually go and that brings a great amount of pain and suffering to your life because you can't accept the reality of the situation.
Like in meditation, you have to come back.
There's danger in having your "should" exist in the future as well. When your should is in the future, you are projecting specific events that have to happen onto a time and place you really have no idea what will happen in the first place. Then, when your projection doesn't happen you end up being incredibly disappointed.
You have to come back.
We are all going to have incredibly painful times in our lives that are going to make us want to project an experience onto a life we really have real idea of what's going to happen. That's ok in some ways, but the reality is you have to come back to living in the mystery of the present moment.
These dark times will always be there.
But what makes us suffer endlessly is not accepting the truth.
So...you have to view it this way. What happened happened...and it couldn't have happened in any other way.
And if you let go of the future, and come back to this moment?
You get to live in the present. You get to live in knowing that life is going to take care of you no matter what happens.
"Should" doesn't exist anymore.
No past...because you've come to terms with it.
No future...because you're in the moment.
Be here.
So stay connected with the present moment.
Accept.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is a professional life coach at AYKME coaching. Dive into some great bible quotes on faith by clicking here or read more quotes on hope.
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